A Moment of Clarity

I'm learning as I live, believe me I'm learning. Hindsight is a bitch, and somebody forgot to tell me. Looking back on the past few months I've realized that my actions were inexcusable to say the least. My selfishness has blinded me to the point of denial, and that's where I've been until now. The cycle must end here. I am no longer making excuses and relying on the fact that some people may never understand me, but make the effort to understand the image I may be projecting. Now I understand that the view from the outside is just as relevant as the view from the inside. I can't explain how it all went down, but I will say that I will take my share of responsibility. I lacked empathy and I never put anyone's feelings into consideration. Not even my own boyfriends. I just brushed them off like they didn't matter, and honestly at the time I didn't think they did. I love him, but I felt like he was trying to take something away from me that I dearly cherished out of spite. I read into this situation all wrong and now I have to live with the consequences. Although healing is on the horizon, I'm feeling the damage I've caused and there's nothing I can do about it but learn from it. It feels better to be in the dark...